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Celebrating Our Founder (a.k.a. Why our Boss is Better than Yours) Part 2

As promised, we continue with some choice excerpts from Doug’s emails over the years. Why? Because if you are wondering why Brown Bag is so successful and such a great place to work, you need look no further than Doug. He is a hilarious, winning coach whose enthusiasm and dedication inspires and motivates our team to give their very best.

Those of you reading this blog likely know Doug Brown as a savvy businessman and an entrepreneur. You’re correct – he is both – but to his employees here at Brown Bag he is much more multi-dimensional. He’s donated time, money and services to charities around Atlanta since Brown Bag’s inception, merrily leading us on fundraising ventures and recruiting us to attend fun charity events. That’s all in addition to running this place, keeping our clients happy, making Brown Bag a great place to work and spending time with his family.

Frankly, we celebrate Doug for all these reasons and more whether he picks up the tab at happy hour or not. But seeing as how he so often does, we gladly nominate him for Boss of the Year. Heck, the century. To the man whose door “is always open, unless it is closed”, on behalf of the entire team, we’re all thrilled to be a part of Brown Bag and look forward to helping Doug celebrate the first of many decades of success!

As always, GO TEAM!!

Doug, encouraging us to get in shape

“…And now you too can look much better than me by taking advantage of JT’s special next week (see below). You can go to any of his classes for FREE. And no, I won’t be in those classes. I don’t like to have people watch me cry so I train individually (plus I hear it’s like coach on the plane where they don’t serve drinks or food…ugh).”

on the subject of acceptable office temperatures

“…lo and behold, after much intense research and examination they found the problems … TWO of our thermostats were set on 80 degrees. Now, for you Canadians, Europeans and Celsius fans out there, 80 degrees is considered HOT unless you are half naked, lying on a beach with a fruity cocktail. So, given that our Daiquiri machine is down right now, we need to NEVER adjust the thermostats EVER…”

on the subject of keeping the break room clean

“…Monday, May 14, in the 2012th Year of our Lord, Brown Bag Marketing has gotten out of the dish supply and cleaning business … it is your responsibility (as it was in the past but there seemed to be a miscommunication or misunderstanding on that detail) to wash them on a DAILY basis OR as we recommend, when you are finished using them … everything left in the sink will either be thrown away OR collected and locked away in our secure glassware safe … Should you lose, misplace or have your mug thrown into the glassware pokey, you will have to wait until the auction to buy it back…”

on the subject of participation concerning a past charity drive

“…if you hate children literacy, puppies and butterflies, then you really don’t have to buy a book or give us some dough but if it’s anything else like you don’t know any book titles, can’t read yourself or don’t have $10, I will personally give title recommendations, reading lessons OR $10 dollars! I will give it to you privately and then you can walk it over to the Lady and you can say in a loud booming voice “buy them poor babies something real fine and tell them Uncle/Aunt (insert your name here) loves them like their momma’s” and finish it off with “and oh by the way, keep the change and buy something pretty for your hair.’…”

on the subject of Labor Day

Team,

In honor of this very special made-up “excuse-to-take-Monday-off” day, we are closing the office officially at 3:00 PM but if you finish up earlier than that, feel free to head out any time after lunch (it’s preferred if you don’t take a two hour lunch and then leave early but I’ll leave that up to you and your level of love for all things Brown and Baggy).

Some helpful tips on things you might consider doing to celebrate the holiday:

1. Go into Labor*

2. Join UK’s Labour Party**

3. Bust up a Labor Union***

4. Become a migrate day Laborer

5. Or just do what you were gonna do anyway and get drunker than most Sunday nights

Whatever you do, do it well, get some rest and come back ready on Tuesday for more “Sack Attack” as we continue our conquest not to rule the world, just the portions we like!

I bid you a Merry Labor Day!

Go Team of Labors!

 

*Please refer to Brown Bag’s pregnancy policy in the soon to be published Brown Bag Marketing Employee Manual

**Please refer to Brown Bag’s strict ban on center-left political party rally’s on premise

***Ask the last guy who tried to unionize The Sack what happened…no wait, he can’t talk with that broken jaw…sorry

 

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